As I've stated in a previous post, being a big sister is hard. Juliet is not getting the one-on-one attention that she used to get. Most of the time, she handles it with grace and love, literally coming next to me to cover her sister in kisses.
But sometimes, and it's usually in the evenings when she's tired from a long day at school, Juliet does not handle it well. Anna, although not as bad as Juliet, does seem to suffer during The Witching Hour. And if she's suffering, rest assured that we're all suffering. I'm suffering as Anna screams her head off and refuses to be consoled. Juliet's suffering as I try to calm Anna and am unable to get Juliet cheese, take her outside, help her potty, or read her books. Ninja's suffering while I work with Anna right past Ninja's 6:00 p.m. dinner time. And even poor Filch is suffering because the combined crying of Anna and Juliet (and sometimes me) is too much for his kitty ears, especially given his PTSD.
I get frustrated with Juliet sometimes because she wants me to hold her or get her things or to have me let her hold Anna... all while Anna is screaming at top volume. (I think I forgot to mention that sweet Anna has found her lungs and can now scream as loudly as her sister used to. In fact, our neighbor actually heard Anna screaming yesterday morning - even though the neighbor was at the street and Anna was in her carrier in the kitchen.) And then, when I'm frustrated, Juliet will sometimes throw a tantrum, which only exacerbates my frustration. These moments are very, very hard and make me miss Ray more than usual. His help and his pep talks would go a long way during The Witching Hour.
In the end, though, I always manage to get Anna down (even if it takes two and a half hours). And once she's down, I can give Juliet the attention she wants and needs. When the house is calm after that storm, I am frequently just amazed at Juliet. She reverts into the sweet child we know and love, reading books and laughing and snuggling. A few nights ago, after a particularly rough time with Anna, I decided to treat myself to a chocolate pudding, and I asked Juliet if she wanted to share. We really don't give her sweets, so this would be a huge treat for her. She sat next to me on the couch and shared a Jell-O pudding cup that was delicious and perfect. Of course, she ended up with chocolate all over her face. But since she's almost two, she was not concerned and ran to get Corduroy, one of her current favorites. Since I was drawing her bath, she decided she'd just sit in the hall outside the bathroom and read to herself until I was ready to snag her and toss her in the tub. I love to watch her read independently (it's likely the English teacher in me - I can't seem to squash her) and grabbed my phone to get a picture. She looked up and gave me a huge grin, and in that moment, all of the frustration, stress, anxiety, and sadness just left. How can you not feel better about everything when you see that face?
If I can get that face from Juliet and Anna's smiles in the same day, I think I may have what it takes to bring peace to the Middle East. With those two smiling at you, you feel like all is right with the world.
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