When to Tell Everyone Else

I've been so concerned about not having our secret get out for the reasons mentioned in my previous post.  But now that I'm getting really close to the twelve-weeks marker (when we told our parents they could start sharing the good news), I've started to really consider whom I want to tell and how I want to tell them.  Like I felt with our parents, I feel like there are some people we should tell before we tell the world.

Two of those people are our siblings.  After all, they're our closest kin besides our parents.  My original thought was to tell both Ray's sister and my brother right before we lifted the gag order on our parents.  However, on Wednesday, I had a very bad bout with a rather unpleasant (and fairly personal) pregnancy symptom.  I was very, very uncomfortable and on the verge of having Ray drive me to the hospital to get some relief.  As I was on the floor with chills and clammy skin crying from the discomfort and frustration, Ray proposed that we first try something from over the counter.  As he was on his way out the door to the pharmacy, I said, "Honey, if you want to call your sister and see what she says, I'm fine with that."  Elizabeth is a labor and delivery nurse at the local hospital and has had three kids herself.  I figured that she might have some good advice about what to do.  He asked, "Are you sure?"  I said, "Positive.  I don't care.  I just need some relief."

Twenty minutes later, Ray was back with some medicine and a much better explanation about what was going on than I'd been able to find in my pregnancy books or through a Google search.  Apparently, not only are pregnancy hormones contributing to the issue, but my prenatal vitamins are exacerbating the problem.  Since I'm not going to stop the prenatals, Elizabeth recommended an additional safe-for-preggered-women medicine to offset.  As I was reaching for my phone to send her a thank you text, I got one from her asking my due date.  It was so nice to talk to someone who is so knowledgeable and who can talk about things from a medical perspective and from personal experience.  I feel so grateful for her.

After telling Elizabeth, I felt like I should tell my brother and his fiancee.  It feels wrong that Ray's sibling knows our secret but my brother doesn't.  However, I decided to hold off just a little bit longer on telling them.  They're getting married April 7, and their bachelor/bachelorette weekends are this weekend.  While I certainly don't think our sharing our news with them would have had an impact on their adventures, I just didn't want to say or do anything that would, in any way, take their focus - even for a moment - off having tons of fun with their friends for the next several days.  I've been texting with Patrick and trying to find a night soon where we can all meet for drinks.

I spent some time talking to my mom about telling the rest of the family.  I've told her I'm okay with her telling pretty much whomever she wants (after I get out of the first trimester) but that I would really like to be the one to share with my two aunts.  They have both been such a fun part of my life; I cannot imagine how awesome they'll be as great-aunts.  (I'm certain my child will be rotten because of them.)

Beyond these family members, we'll want to tell our friends, of course.  But I think I'm going to abstain from posting it on Facebook.  I know it's the cool thing to do, especially if you're like Kellie O'Dare, and I do my fair share of postings.  But I think I'd rather just let the news spread the old-fashioned way (and coming from a small town, I have no doubt it will spread quickly)...  Just a few more days!